The power of asking questions to improve your rates of success in whatever endeavor you’re working on is often underestimated. Asking questions—especially the right ones—is a powerful tool in helping you get what you want out of any conversation. Cami Baker is a thought leader, visionary, TV show host, radio personality and international speaker, among many other things. She speaks with David Adelson about the power of asking questions for achieving success. If you’re not getting to the level you feel you should be on, perhaps you’re not asking the right questions, and steering the conversation your way, but Cami’s strategies should help you find the success you’re looking for.
And if you want more advice from her, Cami is sharing three strategies that 97% of professionals don’t utilize that is costing them a fortune for free!
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How To: Double Your Success By Asking Questions With Cami Baker
Three Specific Skills To Increase Leads, Sales, Dates, And More!
I’m excited because we have with us Cami Baker. One of the things that I like about it, it’s a lesson that my father taught me my whole life. He was good at what he does, which was sales and on radio. Cami, however, is going to tell us how to save the day in getting more dates, making more sales, getting more leads. Is this correct?
Yes, and learning how to ask the right questions.
That’s crucial. The big thing is whatever we want in life, there are ways that we can move forward to get it and there are things that we’ve been doing that don’t help us as much. What Cami is going to present is ways that when we move forward, we’re more likely to get it. Is that correct?
Yes. When you learned to ask questions and stop making statements whether you want dates or more dinners with your friends, more leads or anything, questions move the conversation along.
Let me tell you a little bit about who Cami is. She started selling when she was eight with a 500% profit, selling gum to other kids, which is good. That money was at high interest in collateral at age nine. Fast forward 40-plus years, and her lead generating mindset has gotten her in business from Home Magazine, hosting a TV show, being a radio personality and speaking hundreds of times to audiences from 10,000 to 30,000 in attendance. Cami’s primary focus is on assisting real estate professionals in meeting and mingling with their ideal clients. Recruit top talent and build brand awareness and loyalty through social responsibility. She says there are three specific skills that 95% of the real estate professional doesn’t understand or leverage. She’s going to share those with us. This is exciting. Welcome.
Thank you. I’m excited to be here and to focus on one aspect of asking questions. I honed in on this a couple of years ago when I was doing online dating. Even with all of the business and all of the networking, literally thousands of networking events, six in a day sometimes, and tens of thousands of people I’ve met in business cards exchanged. I was doing online dating, doing it intentionally, literally swiping. When you swipe on online dating, you can swipe in less than a second. You can swipe 100 times a minute. If that’s the case, you can swipe 6,000 times in an hour. I’m not proud of this, but I’m going to say it out loud, I swiped at least a million times. When people make a statement, it stops the conversation. When you want to encourage conversation, you ask the question. I got frustrated that the people that I was trying to communicate with didn’t know that they would say, “Hi.” The best question they can come up with was, “How are you?” I started playing with it.
I remember one guy, it said on his profile that he was in sales. He said he was in business. I asked the question, “What do you do?” His one-word back was, “Sales.” I wrote back to him, “Really? You’re in sales? The one thing you need to sell right now is you. That’s the best you got is a one-word answer?” Based on that experience and then thinking about my business in lead generation and networking, I’ve always been able to give cool analogies, stories and examples back and forth of why dating and why marketing yourself in business are similar. When there are specific questions that we ask, we can set those dates, set those appointments and make more money.
I concur with that. As I said, my dad was always talking to people and ask them questions. People love to talk about themselves. Especially, if you ask questions that they know the answer or that is about them, “That’s interesting. How do you do that part of your job?” What is it that would make that better?” These questions you can engage and move forward. When you make a statement, “Where do you go with that?” I have to ask this because everybody’s going to be curious. What happened with dating? Did something ever come out of it? Where are you now?
I’m single. Dating is what it is. When you’re in your 50s and dating, the good news is you know what you want and you know what you won’t tolerate. My dating coach said to me, “Cami, when you’ll take anything and everything, you have a huge pool, but when you get close and you know exactly what you want, your pool of prospects is limited. It’s normal not to be doing a lot of dating and all of that when you get specific about what you’re looking for.” Even though I have had several boyfriends from dating online, I’m single.When people make statements, the conversation ends; asking questions keeps it moving. Click To Tweet
I understand how that works. I understand the flow of what you’re looking for. I’m not saying single or together is a better thing and some people like to do that. Have you found in dating that certain questions get you further faster? What’s a good question that you ask? Aside from, “What are you doing?” In coming out to date, what’s a great question for people to ask?
Regardless of dating or business, my philosophy is we don’t want to ask yes or no questions. If it’s specifically about setting an appointment in business or setting a date when we ask a question with two choices to help lead the person in the right direction is better than an ambiguous question. For example, if I met you at a networking event if I were to send you a text or an email and say, “Would you like to have a conversation?” That’s a yes or no question or if I were to say, “When would you like to have a conversation?” It’s too big and broad and some people get overwhelmed by, “I’ll handle that later?” If I say, “I’d love to finish our conversation. I have time on Tuesday at 4:00 or Wednesday at 6:00, which is better for you?” When you give people two choices, it gives them the option to say one or the other, or something different. In other words, it’s not overwhelming. You could say, “I’d love to talk some more. Are you better on the phone, on Zoom? Are you more available during the day or the evening?” When you give them two choices, not only is it easier for them to answer but when you think about the psychology of it, we think in loops.
When someone asks you a question like that, it’s like when we were in school and the teacher would ask us a question, we wanted to answer the question. We didn’t want to look stupid, we wanted to finish that loop. When you give the person the opportunity to finish the loop, a lot of the times they will. Whereas, if it’s a yes or no question, that stops it or if it’s, “When would you like to go on a date?” It’s too big and it’s too broad.
That’s a great tip. Some questions can be too open-ended.
For example, if I were doing online dating or any kind of dating, and I don’t want it to show to be about dating, this is about people in general. If I see someone’s profile, I might ask a little bit more of an open-ended question in the beginning. I’m not going to jump right on and say, “Do you want to get married this week or next week?” It would be more like, “You have some lovely photos there. I see you were on an island. What island were you on?” In other words, creating a conversation. I always look for questions that I can ask that will start a conversation. Even if I’m at a networking event, 95% of people all they can come up with this, “What do you do?”
I’m always looking for different questions. One of my favorite questions to ask is, “Tell me something about you that isn’t about your work or where you’re from.” That’s not necessarily a question, but instead of saying, “What do you do? Where are you from?” When I say to people, “Tell me something about you that has nothing to do with your work or where you’re from.” Here’s what I see happen, when you ask a question like that, people look up while they think because they’re searching their brain subconsciously, and then you’ll see them get this little grin because it gives them the opportunity to talk about something that they want to talk about. It might be, “My kids are in a school play this weekend and I’m helping to create a costume. I’ve started writing a book.”
I remember one event I went to and I was talking to this beautiful woman and I asked her, “What are you working on that you’re passionate about?” She searched her mind and she said, “I’m starting my own clothing line.” If I had asked her, “What do you do?” She was a CPA, very boring. “I’m a CPA. I’m a real estate agent. I’m an attorney. I’m a coach.” If you ask something that makes them think, the psychology of this is, when they think of what they love, they get a dopamine rush. They get endorphins, that thing that made them smile and their face light up. They don’t know consciously, but subconsciously you made them feel that way. Therefore, you are creating the bonding.
The other thing I like about that question and a different version of it is, “What are you passionate about?” Which is part of what you said is that most of us walk around and on the tip of our tongue, we have pre-prepared responses for 95% of everything we think we’re going to get asked because we don’t like to think, we’re busy doing other things. People practice elevator pitches, people practice these things and when you ask, “What are you passionate about?” The way that you worded it, “Tell me something about yourself that isn’t a job-related that isn’t about where you’re from.” They have to do this search. It allows them to get deeper and more intimate quickly because you’re telling them, “I’m not interested in what you can do for me. I’m not interested in geography less than I’m interested in you.”
As Tony Robbins, he is known for dropping the F-bomb quite a bit when he’s in his big live events. He has said before that the reason he does that is that it jars people into the state. To your point, we’re walking around in a trance, “What do you do?” “I am a realtor.” When you can ask a question that snaps them into reality and gets them out of the status quo, when you say, “What are you passionate about?” You can almost see people like they woke up or something because you’re asking them something they weren’t expecting. To your point, when you said that it shows that you’re interested, I’ve got seven specific reasons in a video as to why to ask questions. One of the many reasons that you ask questions as opposed to making a statement is because it shows the person that you’re interested in them. Whether it’s a date, a potential business associate, or a friend and people want to know, not that you’re interesting, but that you’re interested in them.
I was talking to a potential client in sales or advertising a long time ago. I knew what our team could do well and I wanted to find out what this person needed. I talked to him for twenty minutes and all I did was ask questions, not just, “What are you looking for? What’s your budget?” Also, “What does your company do? Tell me more about it. What are your long-range objectives? What are your short-range?” He responded that he liked the fact that I did it that way, and I was like, “Why do I want to tell you everything that we can do for you if that’s not what you are interested in. If you’re looking for a blue house and my company sells little Tori trains that are red, we’ve got nothing in common. We can do other things.” By finding out what was going on for him, it made it easier for me to present the aspects of the company.
“We did print, we did radio, we did all.” If he wasn’t interested in radio, print, and direct mail, first you have to go through that whole thing. That was one of the things my dad taught me. I loved that he said that, “I love the way that all you did was ask questions. You never tried to sell me anything.” I have also learned that if you ask someone a question that they know the answer to, they like you, but if you ask them a question that they don’t know the answer to, they don’t like you, which is an interesting thing. What’s your feeling about that? Are there questions that you asked to avoid that?
In sales they say, “Get the small yeses, 5 to 20 yeses before you get to the “close.” When you say, “Remind me again, you said you’re moving to Florida.” “Yes, we’re moving to Florida.” To your point, they know the answer to that and they’re going to say yes, which leads you to the next, yes. There is something to that and if you’re asking this question that they don’t know, people do not want to look bad. They don’t want to look stupid. They don’t want to look like they’re not in the know. Especially, the older they get, sometimes the bigger the ego. That probably is true that when you ask them something, they don’t know that there’s some disconnect there. When you were sharing your story from years ago, made me think of when I was in real estate, I was coached by a group called The Mike Ferry Organization, which is all about scripting and asking questions and keeping the focus on them. Often real estate agents come into a situation, they want to tell you how great they are. I’m going to tell you what they’re going to do and they tell. I remember I had a closing and I was standing in the kitchen of this couple’s home, it was empty. We were doing the walkthrough and we were headed to the closing.
I asked them, “I’m curious, what was it that had you hire me? It was a quick, smooth, fast transaction.” They said, “Cami, the reason we hired you when we were sitting at the dining room table you asked, ‘Are you ready to do whatever it takes to get this property sold?’ The answer was yes.” At that moment, when I asked that question, they both realized, “We are willing, ready and able to do whatever it takes to get it sold.” Asking that question and helping them move along the path is why they hired me. Asking questions so that the person knows that you’re interested, that the questions lead you and them in the direction you want to go in. People could become manipulative and there are all the NLP and all that about manipulating people to go where you want them to. That’s not what I’m talking about. I’m talking about if I’m interacting with someone and I want to go on a date, but they keep making statements like, “The weather is nice. My favorite color is blue.” It’s something that’s not moving.
Do you want to date this guy?
My point is if I want the conversation to move in the direction I want it, then I’ll simply ask a question, “This is a great conversation. I would love to do it face-to-face. Are you available on Tuesday or is Thursday better?” At least, we’re moving in the right direction. If the person doesn’t want to get together in online dating, they ghost and disappear. I’d rather know now that they’re not interested than they keep texting. Let me know now. That’s another reason to ask the questions is that you move the conversation in the direction that you want and you get the results that you’re looking for.
I want to move into lead generation. Lead generation is a whole big rigmarole. Would you kindly tell me your ideal lead generation system? Can you tell me anything you want to about it that can help the audience?
I’m having been to thousands of networking events, and spoken at hundreds of them, and coaching on networking and relationship building, and appointments in lead generation. One of the best ways that I’ve learned to help people get out of their own way is to do what I call purpose leverage marketing. When you can leverage purpose in your marketing or your business development and how you show up. For lead generation, if we are doing something from a place of contribution, when we’re at those events that we were talking about if somebody does say the same boring, “What do you do?” question. There are two different sides to this. If you’re asking the questions, you want to get good at not asking the boring, “What do you do?” question and having more creative questions. On the flip side, you need to know that 90% of the people you meet are going to ask you, “What do you do?” That’s all they can come up with. What is going to be your response to that? When we’re doing purpose leverage marketing or I’m working with someone on whatever their passion is, it gives them a way of talking about that.
If someone were to say, “What do you do?” My client might say something like, “I’m helping a firefighter’s family. He passed away from cancer. We’re doing a rundown on the beach next month. I’m helping them to raise awareness.” In other words, “What do you do?” is not, “I’m a financial service provider.” He starts talking about what he’s doing as opposed to, “What do you do?” We can bring that into it. The other thing about it has a unique sales proposition. How can you show up differently than the eight other realtors or the twelve other financial service providers? As far as lead generation goes, instead of even going to a networking event, I wrote the book on networking, Mingle to Millions: The Art and Science of Building Business Relationships have to do with being more efficient and effective with networking. If you want to lead generate if you want to build your customer base, don’t go to the networking events to do it, go where your clients and customers are. When I know who your ideal client is and what you’re passionate about, we create a campaign that gets you out meeting thousands of them without going to networking events.The older people get, the bigger their egos tend to become. Click To Tweet
How does that work? During lockdown time that we’re at, do you do it online with Zoom? How do you set this up? It’s hard to go where your ideal clients are.
One of the things that I’ve taught my clients is the power of Facebook lives, which you can do at your business or you could do it from home. You can do it like what we’re doing. You can do it on a Zoom and do it live through Facebook. I might teach my client, “You’re a real estate agent. You want to get in front of people who have young children, they own a home and they want to sell and they want to sell what they got, and they want to buy the next.” That’s a great client for a real estate agent. What if you communicated with ten businesses in the area that had those exact clients themselves?
If that real estate agent client has had young kids, so do the karate dojos, the dance studios, the orthodontist, the dentist and the pediatricians, that real estate agent could do a campaign around a cause that they’re passionate about. Kids, especially in that scenario and maybe they’re doing some Zoom interviews of the local pediatrician talking about why they’re part of this campaign to help kids with MS, St. Jude’s, or a local child that’s been diagnosed with something. In other words, leveraging something beautiful and purposeful and why you’re having those conversations. Do them live and teach these businesses how to interact, mingle and share these Facebook lives together. It’s a whole strategy. Instead of doing an activity, it’s about having a strategy and leveraging your time.
I like what you say about this whole thing about some service-oriented projects to be involved in. Particularly, for the younger generation or under 30 that they are socially conscious and that you see that in a lot of packaging that you say, so you hear them about marketing, “The soap that we buy now as this whole big thing about how many likes of posts they’ve given away and how many people they’ve sent to school and how much water they’ve purified. Over here there’s another product that we get that has helped send kids to school.” Whatever it is, that story seems to have a huge impact on people accepting them.
Here are the statistics around that because what you’re talking about is statistical. All things being equal, 50% of the marketplace are Millennials of the people who are working. By 2025, 75% of all the people in this country that have a job will be Millennials. The reason that’s important is that 62% of them won’t even work for you or your company if you’re not on purpose, because they know they’re not going to work for the same company for 30 years, get a gold watch, had the government take care of them and retire. That’s not the plan anymore. They don’t want that anyway. When you and your company are doing something extraordinary and community-centered, etc., you attract top talent, you keep them longer and the people that are out there consuming will want your product. To your point, they have all this packaging. Here’s the other statistic. If there are two real estate agents, two coaches or two dog walkers or whatever the profession is, 87% of consumers will choose the one that they know to be on purpose.
The one that they know is helping the kids with the bicycles, saving the puppies or feeding the veterans. Not only is it the right thing to do for people and the planet, but it’s the right thing to do for profits. I’ve taken that to the whole next level because having a history in real estate and being creative with my marketing and branding, I have learned about the charitable gifting of real estate. When real estate is donated to nonprofits, how the real estate agent makes a higher commission, the property donor gets some massive tax write-offs and the nonprofits. The nonprofits that can wrap their head around this can grow 100 times faster because every year, $400 billion is given to nonprofits, and less than 2% comes from real estate, yet 43% of any person’s wealth is in real estate. At a time with the pandemic, no matter if you make a $10,000, $100,000 or $100 million a year, people want to hang onto that cash. They’re not writing a check for $500 to the puppies like they used to, but when they can donate property and save money on their taxes.
Instead of the nonprofit going around begging or doing bake sales, “Will you buy a $5 raffle ticket and look, all these events are close.” To your point, “We don’t have any events going on. We’re not having fundraisers where people are coming together, but do you know what we can do? We can all pick up the phone and talk to some people we know, have a property donated, and help that nonprofit make hundreds of thousands or millions instead of a $5 raffle ticket.”
Are you doing that in some way or aggressively?
Yes, aggressively, assertively doing it. I have founded the Alliance for Charitable Gifting of Real Estate. In the alliance, we have all the moving pieces to facilitate these transactions. Nonprofits typically, if you were to say, “I got a house, would you like it?” They’re like, “No,” They don’t want to be property managers or they don’t know what to do with it, or they’ve never sold a property. It has confused people do nothing. When you have a group like ours that can facilitate that property, and when the real estate people in the area know that by giving a property, they’re not avoiding a commission, they’re earning a higher commission, then they want to get involved in that as well. Whether you’re a real estate agent who wants to make more money, whether you are a nonprofit that needs to grow and people don’t have the cash to give you any more, or whether you’re a property owner that has one extra property or 100 extra properties, it benefits everyone.
If somebody wants to get in touch with you about that, how did they do that?
Cami Baker is real, raw, relatable and reachable. [email protected]. I’m on Facebook, LinkedIn, I’m all over the place and CamiBaker.com/free. We are creating a new gift if you will there that will give the five questions that you can ask your nonprofit, your real estate agent or the property owners you know that can start the conversation about the Charitable Gifting of Real Estate.
Cami, I’m enjoying this. What else would you like to let everyone know about? We’re getting to the end and I don’t want to leave anything off that you would like to present.
I just want to encourage people to think outside of the box. Don’t get hung up in old ways. The ways that have always been done. I think about an old Southern story around a woman. She makes us wonderful ham, the best ham ever. When she makes the ham, she cuts the ends off the ham and her husband says, “You make the best ham. Why do you cut the ends off the ham?” She said, “I don’t know. It’s the way my mom always did it.” He asked the mother, “Your daughter, my wife makes the most wonderful ham, but she always cuts the ends off of it. Why is that?” The mother says, “I don’t know. That’s how my mama did it. She always cut the ends off.” He goes and he asks the grandmother, “Why are your daughter and your granddaughter cutting the ends off the ham?” She said, “I cut the ends off the ham because my pan was too small.” We get hung up in these old-fashioned ways of being, we don’t even know why. It’s the ‘monkey see monkey do’ with the whole thing back in the day when the scientists had the monkeys and that’s another whole story too.
Don’t get hung up in old ways. Look for ways to grow and change. Like with this whole Charitable Gifting of Real Estate. A lot of strange misconceptions about it. If you have a nonprofit and you find yourself doing the begging or bake sales or if you’re a real estate agent and you know a lot of people with real estate, but you find yourself always begging for your commission and up against other agents to negotiate your commission. You can specialize in the Charitable Gifting of Real Estate and get the highest commission in town because it is such a specialty. I’m certifying real estate agents to learn how to do exactly that. Think outside of the box.
If you’re interested, I’d like to play a game with you. Let’s come up with a whole bunch of questions to start a conversation with. You came up with one already, this not a question, but it’s a question, “Tell me something about yourself that does not work-related or about where you’re from.” From that, we extrapolated, “Tell me what you’re most passionate about.” Whether it’s business or personal if need to determine the type of question you ask, one of the questions that come up is, “Tell me the most exciting adventure you’ve ever had in your life.” Another one is, “Have you ever stolen anything?” Let’s see if we could come up with 5 or 6 questions as a conversation starter.
It depends on the situation but for example, you have a lovely logo and I taught people back in the day if you go to expos and trade shows when the best way to start a conversation is, “I love your logo. Are you a franchise or did you create that yourself?” “I love those colors. Did you pick those or did your wife pick those?” Questions like that get people thinking, “That’s lovely. How did that even come to be?”
“I love your colors. Is that somehow related to your message?”
On people’s business cards, another way that people missed the boat, they exchanged these business cards and they put that card right in their pocket. If you look at that card, people spend hours, days and weeks picking out the font, and the colors and the design to look at that card and say, “I see you’re from Marvel. My last boyfriend was from Marvel. Tell me about that something that I heard about there.” “I see that your building is in the same area.” In other words, if you look at their card, “This is a great paper. Where did you get your cards from? I’d like to have some of these made.” Focusing on what’s in front of you. One of my favorites is, “Girl, I love those shoes. Where did you get those shoes?” I was going to name my book, Girl, I Love Those Shoes, but if it’s a guy, “Dude, I love that tie, that matches your eyes. That suit looks great on you. Is that custom made?”About 50% of the current marketplace is actually composed of millennials. Click To Tweet
“That’s a lovely spider pin you have on. Where did you get that?”
I have mentioned to people many times over the years, if you don’t know how to create conversation or ask questions, I’ll tell them, “What is that thing that you wear?” Whether it’s a nice pair of jeans, pair of fancy shoes, a broach and a certain hat, some women are known for being the hat lady. What is that thing that when you wear it, you get compliments all the time? If you know that spider broach is going to get comments, then wear it whenever you go to an event where you want to create conversation because you already know people are going to say, “I love that.” It gives you an opportunity to say, “This is part of my brand,” which it is.
I want to ask you one more, it may turn into several more questions. This whole idea of asking questions, you talked about going to networking or going to places where people are, don’t you work with other people start out shy or do you only work with people who have moved past that point? The question is if you’re dealing with somebody who’s going to the event and they’re new in the business, maybe they’ve become a real estate agent or they become a salesperson of the advertising or they know what they’re doing and they’re shy to move forward. How do you help them overcome that shyness?
Being the driver of AAA, outrageously out their personality that I am, I don’t work with people who are shy because we are far on opposite ends of the spectrum that frankly, I turn them off. Being a polarizing individual, I attract those that I’m here to serve and I repel those that I’m not. We all are that way. I’m clear that I’m that way. For people who are shy, here’s what I would say to them. Use that to your advantage. Never try to be what Cami’s, David’s, or anybody else is being, use what you have to your advantage. For people who are quiet and reserved, the fact is they’re better networkers because they can listen. A lot of the times people who are extroverted and talky, they may talk a lot but they’re not listening, so they’re not learning.
The fact is when my mouth is moving, I already know what my mouth is saying. I’m not learning anything. As a matter of fact, I went to Sage Summit and I saw Ashton Kutcher speak. There were 10,000 of us in the room. I see Ashton Kutcher there and he’s the guy from That ‘70s Show, the stoner. He looks young. I thought, “What’s Ashton Kutcher doing here?” Come to find out he owns a little piece of about 600 companies. He’s brilliant. They said to him on the stage, “How did you become successful with all these companies?” He said, “I found my way into rooms with people that were way smarter than me and I kept my mouth shut for a couple of years, listening until I had something intelligent to say.”
I love this idea of what you said, “Don’t try to be a Cami or a David or whoever you are.” Even David is not a David all the time because I can be, “What am I doing here?” What that means is if you are a shy person and going into a situation, you can go up to somebody and say, “I’m unsecure here. You look like you know what you’re doing. Can you help me?” That question engaging and not stopping the conversation, which is the key is how do you continue the conversation going?
Life is a buffet. Take what you like, leave what you don’t. Go back and get some more what you like. There’s a guy here in the Boston marketplace, Tom Maloney, he is the connector of Boston, networking oriented and he and I have shared the stage 3, 4 or 5 times, physically on stages, talking about networking. He and I have completely opposite thoughts on this and I’ll share both of them for that shy person. First of all, I’m introverted in a lot of ways. People think I’m extroverted, but like you, I’m on. I’ve got my makeup, my heels, my suit and my broach on, I show up to shine but I would assume, be sitting on the couch with a book or watching TV as much as the next person.
The way Tom and I are different in this way, my idea is first of all, if you’re shy, what you want to do is set intention before you even go. Set intention, pay attention, create retention. When we set an intention and we reach out and research, reach out relationship build, before we go to the event, introduce ourselves to the leader of the organization, to the speaker that’s going to be there. If it’s a meetup and you can see the 30 attendees on the side, reach out. When you create a conversation with people before you get there, then when you get there, you can say, “I’m looking for Cami Baker.” “We’ve been emailing back and forth. It’s nice to meet you finally.” It’s way better than walking in the cold. I teach people how to do that as well.
For me, I want to go to the big dog in the room. I want to shake hands with David. I want people that are coming in the door to know that I know the organizer. I’m hanging out with the leader and it doesn’t matter if we met five minutes ago or if we went to school together five years ago, people walking in see us communicating by association that elevates me in the eyes of everyone else. When I get there early and I say, “David, I’m glad you’ve got this event going on. Can I help you put flyers on the seats? Can I help you sign people in?” When I start that relationship with him as people are coming in, you’re going to introduce me, “Bob, this is Cami.” If you go to the big dog in the room by association, you are elevated. My friend, Tom, will tell you to do the opposite, what you said, “Go to the person who’s the quietest in the room and the shyest in the room because maybe they have a better story than anyone and they’re easy to approach.” Two different ways of going about it. Either way, it’s about human interaction. You can’t stand in the corner or stay at home and make things happen.
I have two things about that. One is I remember listening to a tape in a sales organization and they were talking about building a home business. One of the things they said is people spend a lot of time organizing products on the shelf and cleaning the room and all of that. He said, “The problem with that is how many potential clients are there in your home? Can you think of a nice round figure? You have to get out and go see people.” The other thing that I like is this whole idea of continuing the conversation, which is a lot of what we need to do in life.
There was this movie that I saw several years ago called The First Time. It’s a sweet movie about these two people in high school that meet and fall in love and it’s fun watching the whole process of how they do. Apparently, they have sex and it doesn’t go well, and then they’re all freaking out and think the whole thing’s going to fall apart because of the first time for both of them. They’re experts, everybody knows what they’re doing then. The guy comes back after the girl has already thought she’s wrong, the whole thing, and comes back into the driveway in the morning to meet her. He says, “I would like to continue this conversation. As long as we continue the conversation, things will be alright.”
I loved that idea of he’s not saying, “Let’s get married. Let’s have a relationship. Let’s do a Disney princess.” He just, “Let’s continue the conversation and as long as we’re continuing conversation, everything will work out. It’ll be fine.” It sounds like that’s a wonderful way in business as well as long as we’re continuing the conversation and then we can add the qualities of using questions to do that. We can have the qualities of having a purpose because people like to support something an organization that’s doing something, whatever that purpose is. You mentioned the dog walker, and if there are two dog walkers and one purpose is to make sure the dogs have a great time and feel loved, and the other one is a dog walker, you’re right, everybody’s going to go for the one. I love these points that you’ve made. Do you have any last key summary things?
On this note, with shy people or even anyone. For me, it’s about quality versus quantity for a lot of reasons. Instead of trying to get a card from 30 people or instead of trying to communicate with way, lots of people stick to three. To your point, if you’re going to continue the conversation, if there are 30 people there and you don’t remember them and you didn’t talk to that one, “I don’t even remember what this card, I don’t even remember what he looks like.” You’ve got 30 of them. It’s overwhelming. It’s daunting. You’re not going to stay in touch with them. Those cards are going to go from your desk to your pocket, to the drawer and nothing’s ever going to happen with them. If you focus on three and you have three nice conversations where you talk about your children or you talk about that you have cancer, a college or a cause in common, then when you do follow up and continue the conversation, you remember each other. It was a bond there. There’s a reason to follow up. Quality versus quantity will help in all of that.
I want to emphasize that point, which I love about is this idea of one of the things that I always learned is you go to the highest first. This idea that who’s putting on the event, who’s leading the whatever it is, who’s the big dog in the room you go to. Whether it’s influential or it may not be influential, whoever is most in line with what you’re trying to accomplish, if you can create a conversation and continue with those people, those are the people that can lead you where you want to be. It’s the idea of, “Do you want to sell a million of something for a dollar?” or “Do you want to sell one thing for a million dollars?” They both will get it. I love the idea of those three. I will use that because I have gone to many events where I do come home with a stack of cards and if I don’t do something within the first three days, you don’t remember all these things come up.
Let me leave you with the creed. David, put your hand on your heart. This is in the back of my book.
I, David, solemnly swear will never ever ask for another business card unless I have full intention of following up and I do it within three days. That sounds lovely. Thank you for being here, Cami. I appreciate it. There’s a lot of useful information that you’ve given everybody. Is it an eBook or what is it that they’re going to get?
Putting up the five questions you can ask nonprofits, real estate people or property owners that will get the conversation going about Charitable Gifting of Real Estate.
That’s a wonderful thing to be doing in the world. I agree that’s, “Do less and accomplish more.” It’s much easier to get a piece of property than it is to get 500 raffle tickets sold. Thank you, Cami. We’d love to have you back sometime, but we want to give it a while. Good luck with everything that you do. If there’s anything we can do to support you, please let us know.
- Cami Baker
- Mingle to Millions: The Art and Science of Building Business Relationships
- Alliance for Charitable Gifting of Real Estate
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- Facebook – Cami Baker
About Cami Baker
HGTV House Hunters veteran, Top 5% of Realtors and mentored by the best in the real estate industry and personal development space. Cami Baker has leveraged her creative and innovative ways of seeing opportunity since she was a child. At 8 years old, she was selling gum to other kids for a 500% profit and loan sharking that money for high interest and collateral at 9! Fast forward 40+ years and her lead generating mindset has gotten her in Success from Home magazine, hosting a TV show, being a Radio personality and speaking hundreds of times to audiences from 10 to 30,000 in attendance.
Cami’s primary focus is assisting real estate professionals to meet and mingle with their ideal clients, recruit top talent and build brand awareness and loyalty through social responsibility. She says there are three specific skills that 95% of the real estate profession doesn’t understand or leverage, and she’s going to share those with us on today’s show!